Insights into Facebook: At 12am
The following conversation takes place on a Saturday night, at approximately 12am.
Location: Facebook.
Shirley 12:14am
Just agree with Shirley and you won’t go Wong.
Michael 12:14am
Haha
Shirley 12:16am
I once used that line and it won me an election.
Michael 12:16am
Oh wow
Are you just gonna cut and paste this for your column?
Yes, it’s a Saturday night; I’m on Facebook and am about to pass out (though not from large amounts of alcohol, but rather extreme tiredness). Yet, in this sleep-deprived state, I still managed to have a coherent conversation with fellow Salienteer Michael Langdon.
It’s funny what cool things you can discuss at 12am. It’s also cooler doing it when you are rather sleepy. We mused over many things that Saturday night, like Ancient Greece, hit-lists and why he should never cross me. I thought I’d share some of these insights in the hope that maybe, just maybe you’ll get to know the real Michael Langdon—the one taken away from all the glitz and glam of the Salient office and reduced to nothing but the naked truth, pandas and procrastination (also, cutting and pasting is so much easier than writing a column).
We all know Michael as sub-editor for Salient, though more famously writer of teh grammerz, where he teaches us all about the English language (though, I must note that during our Facebook conversation, he failed to finished most of his sentences with a full-stop). But past that stern exterior, he’s actually really lazy:
Shirley12:00am
You should go for editor 09.
You could decorate every page with pandas.
Michael12:00am
Hmm
Don’t think I could do it
Procrastination is too important to me
Last year I was handing in my essays three, four weeks late all the time
Shirley12:01am
I wish my lecturers minded.
But they say to me “Shirley, we don’t want a due date to be a burden to you… just hand it in when you want to.”
Michael12:02am
Exactly what mine said!
Except they didn’t call me Shirley
Have you seen the movie Airplane?
Shirley12:03am
I was deprived of technology as a child.
Michael12:04am
“Surely you can’t be serious!”
Shirley12:04am
“I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.”
Michael12:05am
—Airplane
Ahh, great movie.
Shirley12:05am
…
I took this time to notice that there were a lot of people on Facebook at 12am. I couldn’t help but wonder if they were doing the same thing as me, which lead me to my next topic of conversation.
Shirley12:07am
Does sleep count as procrastination?
Michael12:08am
Hmmm, depends on if you’re sleeping to avoid doing something
Shirley12:08am
But people usually can’t force sleep on themselves.
So you only sleep if you are tired.
Hence, you wouldn’t be avoiding something.
Michael12:08am
You could pretend… haha
Though the next revelation takes place in the space of a minute, many things occurred:
Firstly I concluded that sleep was not procrastination. Michael, who was warned not to cross me, agreed.
Secondly, Michael learned not to cross me.
Somewhere in that time-line we possibly also found the answer to world peace.
Shirley 12.09am
We, who decree the laws of procrastination, agree that sleeping is not counted.
Michael12:10am
What about procrastination from sleeping?
Shirley12:11am
Hmmm.
Why would one want to avoid sleeping?
Keeping in mind that procrastination is to avoid something we don’t/can’t do
Michael12:12am
This reminds me of some quote or saying
“I’ve been thinking about giving that some thought”
Hmmm I dunno
Shirley12:12am
That is not good enough Mr Langdon.
Michael12:12am
Urgh
Not at this time of night!
I’m procrastinating from going to bed
It’s funny how time goes by on Facebook. Maybe it’s that particular time of night where all the midnight fairies come out, just like in Shakespeare. One minute becomes two, which then turns to five—like how one question expands into an entire discussion. Well, time does fly when you are having fun. But most probably, I was having naps in between each sentence. Oh well.
Shirley12:15am
Ok, ok I have a new definition.
Procrastination: Facebook.
Michael12:15am
I think that pretty much sums it up, yeah
Agreement at last.
Huzzah!