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Salient Blind Dating

Shock Jock



Having set up (probably) hundreds of happy couples over the past year, the uber-popular Salient Blind Dating returns soon for another hit season.

How it works: a couple, completely foreign to each other, have the chance to find true love over a free meal, courtesy of The Establishment (to the value of $200). To participate in Salient blind dating, e-mail your answers to the following questions to editor@salient.org.nz.

What do you like/dislike about a man or woman
What turns you on?
How would you describe yourself?

In the spirit of blind dating, SJ turned to some dating agencies to find love…
FIND SOMEONE: “Thanks for calling Find Someone customer support. Calls cost $1.99 per minute. Please make sure you are the person paying for the call…”
Ring …ring…
(Cost $.60)
FS: Good afternoon, Find Someone.
SHOCK JOCK: What should I say to someone on a date?
FS: I beg your pardon?
SJ: I’m just wondering what topics to talk about on my date?
FS: Oh okay. I’m not sure. What sorts of things are you interested in?
SJ: I like writing for magazines.
FS: You could talk about some things that you’ve done there. I mean it’s always good to ask people about what they are into as well. I’m not entirely sure.
SJ: Do you know what makes a good relationship?
FS: No, I don’t know if anyone knows that.
FS: I mean that depends on the people doesn’t it?
SJ: Do you have any bargains?
FS: Bargains? What do you mean?
SJ: Can money buy me love?
FS: I think that depends on the girl.
SJ: Do you know where she lives?
FS: No ha ha…
(Total cost = $4.10)
CC: Good afternoon, Country and City Contacts.
SJ: Can I make a date?
CC: We can send you an information pack. All our introductions are done through the post. The cost to join is $195 dollars.
SJ: Do you have any bargains?
CC: No, but you’re probably best to try the net. Okay?
SJ: The net?
…beep, beep, beep…