I was going to be able to review some new kick arse party pumping wii game for you folks this week. But I can’t. Hitech, the main distributer of Nintendo products in New Zealand went into receivership, and subsequently the Salient office lost of its drip feed of Nintendo goodies. Fucking bummer.
So instead I’ve decided to bring to you guys an industry update. Some pretty exciting stuff was announced over the holidays. One of the press releases was so exciting Hansmoleman2000 needed to send his keyboard back to Microsoft to use the ‘unexpected and unidentifiable spillage’ warranty. But more on that later.
First up is the latest instalment from our good friends at Lucasarts. The Star Wars franchise is a fucking cash cow, and big George has certainly milked it near to death. Thankfully for us gamers, the games they have churned out haven’t been half bad. We’ve all had fun playing Dark Forces, Jedi Knight Outcast, and Jedi Academy. Now the latest instalment is about to hit shelves. Starwars: The Force Unleashed. And it looks pretty wicked. Like its spiritual predecessors you play in third person, with a lightsabre, slashing up stormtroopers. Although this time, the main character ain’t someone as cool, ruthless and handsome as the dashing Karl Katran, but instead some sith whelp called Starkiller. Lame-o…
But the game does boast some pretty fancy graphics and physics. It will showcase Digital Molecular Matter (DMM), an extremely detailed and realistic physics engine and Euphoria, a realistic bio-mechanical A.I. engine. So hopefully droids will duck behind cover when you lob ion grenades at them this time around. If you liked the Jedi Knight series (and you should, it’s a great gig) then you will like this latest offering. One of the concept art images has Starkiller pulling a Star Destroyer out of orbit with the force. That’s wicked cool. Expect Star Wars: The Force Unleashed to hit shelves on September the 17th.
Secondly there were two very important announcements from Blizzard. The Google of the gaming industry at the moment, as you would be if you sell and continue to deal gaming crack World of Warcraft.
Blizzard has announced that Starcraft 2 is nearly ready for release. Traditionally Blizzard has kept tight lips about release dates, but all indications are that it’s nearly ready to roll. South Korea is already upgrading its power generation and internet infrastructure in anticipation. Ten years in the making Starcraft 2 is poised to set fanboys all over the world on fire. Following closely the ingenious structure and design of the original game – micro-managed economies are back and tiered level design make a return, allowing for increased strategy (and jet packs!). But the campaign is different. It’s non linear, allowing you to pick and choose which mission to attempt and when. The Protos, the Terran and the Zerg are all back with a vengeance.
The final orgasm inducing, instant hardware purchasing, mouth salivating announcement by Blizzard is that Diablo III is already in development, and even at game testing stage. Let me repeat that. Diablo III is confirmed and already over halfway through development. Omfg! Diablo I and Diablo II are games that to any true h4xx0r have become part of the gaming socio-economic and geo-political landscape. The dulcet sounds of the guitars of Tristam in Diablo I, and the oppressive ambience of the Pandemonium fortress have become cultural signposts in gaming lore. But a return to those fantastic days is not all that Diablo III can offer. Stay a while, and listen. Diablo III finally brings the series into the new updated world of fancy graphics and grunty processors. I can’t wait to smash goblins at a resolution greater then 800×600. Blizzard has also announced that Diablo III will have greatly revised controls, akin to the intuitive HUD found in World of Warcraft. This is great news, switching class skills in the old instalments was cumbersome, especially in heated battles. Set twenty years after Diablo II: Lord of Destruction, your chosen hero will have to face some kind of evil force. What that is has not been elucidated yet. Exciting stuff. Diablo III also promises co-operative game play, and updated multiplayer support. I can see this one being a favourite at many shini-lans to come. Bring it on Blizzard, and I’m pretty sure Hansmoleman2000 will get down on all fours if you stick in another secret cow level. I can’t fucking wait.