I’ve recently been publicly criticised because apparently my columns “talk shit about everyone”. I was confused by this, so I went back through my columns over the last two years, where I found I’ve written negative reviews in only three columns out of over forty.
Still, looking back at them now I focused on the negative side of things often while ignoring positive aspects of the beers I’m reviewing. For example, it’s bloody hard to brew a beer that tastes of very little.
Maybe it’s time to revisit the beers which I have criticised over the years, but from a more neutral standpoint taking into account the brewers intentions. First of all:
Tui
The good: Since my original column Tui has been packaged in long neck bottles, giving it a classier appearance. A good move in my books, stubbies are so ’90s. The beer is very well made with no nasty flavours like in some other big-scale beers.
The bad: No nasty flavours, great. But there’s no flavour at all. I enjoy a little character to my beers, but if all you’re after is something cheap and easy drinking why not go for it. However, my main annoyance about Tui remains—it is NOT an India Pale Ale as advertised, it is a goddamn lager.
Steinlager Classic
The good: There are worse beers out there to be widely seen as this country’s main beer export, and it showcases NZ grown green bullet hops.
The Bad: The green bullet hops often taste skunky due to UV light damaging the hop oils through the green bottle. Cans are the way to go here.
Steinlager Pure
The good: I recently learned that this beer contains one of my favourite hops, Nelson Sauvin. And if I concentrate I can just taste it. It’s also fairly dry, giving it a thirst-quenching quality.
The bad: If I don’t concentrate I might as well be drinking Tui.
Steinlager Edge
The good: At 3.5 per cent it is a good choice for a drinking session if you’ve got to be up early for work.
The bad: A thinner, blander version of Steinlager. Drinking it seemed like a waste of energy. Just go for one of the other two versions, unless you’re at the Basin Reserve for a cricket match where unfortunately this is all they’re serving.
So sure, I’ve talked shit. And I will continue to, but only when I think it’s necessary and will spark some constructive debate and discussion about the issue. If you’re just making negative comments for the sake of being nasty, you’re just trollin’.